I'm thankful yes I'm blessed just to know you...more beautiful than the Mona Lisa, worth more than gold...you're my latest, you're my greatest inspiration...you inspire me....Teddy Pendergrass
When I took this picture of this little munchkin we were singing the sponge bob square pants song really
really loud, really really off key and when I would mess up the words she would fall out into a fit of giggles and correct me. At the point of this smile I think Spongebob had just eaten a ton of crabby patties and turned green and she found that extremely funny (go figure). Why share this? So glad that you asked...
While sitting in church today listening to a sermon that I feel the pastor was (as we like to say) walking around all up in my backyard, and finding myself drifting at times to the places in my mind that is reserved for the moments of kicking myself because of unrealized dreams and goals, I had an epiphany ...it was simply....shut the hell up self, just be quiet.
My mind immediately thought about my niece Christina....from even before her birth she has been fighting to live...determined to be here, letting nothing and no one stop her.
When my sister first found out she was pregnant (for like the millionth time...honest to goodness I think that Alicia is taking the scripture to " be fruitful and multiply" to heart like God was giving her a personal directive) the doctors informed her that this child was not going to have a normally developed heart.
The prognosis was that (we are going to speak in lay-mans simple speak here ...Alicia was explaining to me with the technical terms and she confused herself and gave me a headache) Christina had to have heart surgery upon birth, her heart was going to develop with a right ventricle that was too small and her great arteries (aorta and pulmonary) were both going to be attached to this underdeveloped ventricle. What the doctors would have to do (over a process of three surgeries in almost as many years) is attach the two arteries together to make one big artery, leave a hole in the right ventricle so that the left ventricle can help pump her blood and they also have to redirect the veins that provides the blood flow. whew...and this is lay-mans terms?
Christina was born and went immediately into surgery to have the first portion of the correction done. She stayed in the hospital for what seemed like forever and then she came home. I can't speak for anyone else but I was so concerned about how she was going to acclimate to her environment and grow and how delicate would we have to be with her?
Well she quickly dispelled any concerns about her being a helpless, needing a soft glove-touch little girl. As a matter of fact I have NEVER....repeat....NEVER heard a bigger mouth and I have never seen a hungerier and stronger baby. With all the medicine she had to take and the injections she had to get she was a trooper...to the point that if you were late or dragging your feet with her medicine she would gladly remind you with the loudest alarm you have ever heard.
When it was time for her second surgery in she went and for a minute in the operating room it was touchy and the surgons were concerned; but here this little treat at barely a year old came through like a refreshing gust of wind on a hot summer day. This time the doctors gave her a healing time of 4 months and they were absolutely shocked when she cut the time in half and was running around like a mini-dennis the meneace (as were we...as were we).
She still has one more surgery to go, it has to do with the last portion of redirecting the flow of her blood, and God....has been there since the beginning and through it all...for God will continue to work His miracles....
I say all of this to say:
For two years and two months this angel...this tangible miracle of God has been determined to not only live but there is nothing that stops her from acheiving everything she sets her mind to. She walked before she was barely a year old, she has learned how to climb out of her crib (not always landing on her feet but she dusts her little behind off and runs out of the room to where she wants to go), the first word she spoke was (I think) eat, and now she speaks clearly and dare I say eloquently effective in giving commands and directives, she is almost potty trained and knowing my sister is on her way to making her first three course meal(consisting of juice, cereal everywhere, and bread). I have never seen her stumped, or stopped (a problem for me when babysitting), and if you are to slow she just does it herself (again a problem when babysitting because she has energy that far surpasses mine).
I say this to say;
She is my latest and greatest inspiration....of course scripture tells me that all things are possible with God, that if He promises He always keeps His word...I believe that His time is not equivalent to my own (I'm more of a want it all right now kind of person and I think that God is more laid back...you know He has plans and all).
I do know that Christina has been faced with odds that I will never have to deal with, and she may not understand the severity of what she is going through and it really doesn't matter...this is all she knows and what she has taught me is that in spite of circumstances, situations, conditions...in spite of the fact that it may not be picture perfect...its ours and there is always a way when there is a will.
She is teaching me that differences are not hinderences, that normalcy is what I make it not how others define it and there is always another way and a solution if we just look.
She reminds me that life is to be lived...because we want it....because it is a gift....life is not to be lived with fear but with fervor, freedom, fearlessness, faith.
She shows me that strength lies within our will, our breaths.
She lives passionately, confidently, lovingly; knowing what she wants, likes, needs (and makes no bones about letting you know what she wants, likes, and needs).
God has been with this child every step of the way, He has been blessing her keeping her guiding her and leading her and He is using her life as a testimony to what is truly important...to live our best lives our best ways our own ways. ...To live....
So when I get into my down in the dumps what the hell bag...honestly I simply ...well first I tell that part of my self to shut up but then I remember my tiny framed, brown suga mocha momma Inspiration...and I smile and I say thank you God for her presence in my life...she is ...in one word...delicious
This Child....
